J.C.Q.

Remember those days before the e-mail when you got this handwritten chain letter that said "copy this letter and give it to four friends and send a postcard to X?" Some kids that had a Commodore 64 got their parents to type it for them, and everyone thought that was soooo cool because the letter looked as professional as the writing in a book?

Well, the great thing about those yesteryears was that no one would harass me if I didn't send out three copies and BROKE THE CHAIN FOREVER and some poor kid in Malawi consequently did not receive a postcard. But now, with the avent of in-your-face-technology, I am only an e-mail away from being harassed by friends if I don't fill out the latest 100 questions survey. I won't mention any names, but The Girls sure like to put on that last inevitable question -- Who is the least likely to respond to this e-mail? -- my name. And then I feel bad.

Now blogs have their own version of chain letters, namely "Tags". Grrr. Who was the Clever Dan that came up with this? The Jurist has tagged me, and I'd feel bad if I didn't respond. So I will, but I refuse to answer the questions from my perspective. Instead, I will write it from B.A.Q.'s point-of-view.

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1. If money were no object, what would you be doing with your life?

J.C.Q. and I would not have to work, and I could therefore devote my life just to her. I would give her rub backs whenever she demanded them, and buy ten genetically-modified Allerca cats.

2. Money is just that - an object, so why aren't you doing it?

I don't know, why do people think that the only way of making a joke is to use sexual inuendos?

3. What's better: horses or cows?

J.C.Q. is better.

4. What do you think the secret to happiness is?

Taking allergy pills so that J.C.Q. can have lots of kitties and quit asking me each day for kitties, which is driving me up the wall. Therefore, I will go to Costco today and buy a bulk box of Allergeeze.

5. When was the last time you had a dream that you either remember well or did not want to awake from? Can you share a bit?

Stupid question. I refuse to answer.

6. When you were a little kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

Guy that drives that big round thing that makes the pavement even (What can I say, B.A.Q. was a pretty stupid kid).

7. Complete this statement: Love is...

Kitties for J.C.Q.

8. Can you tell a good story? (write one!)

Once upon a time, B.A.Q. took away J.C.Q.'s fish Sammy because she was not taking care of him. J.C.Q. tried to tell B.A.Q. that Sammy liked playing with the algea and that's why she didn't clean his bowl. But B.A.Q. wouldn't listen. Then J.C.Q. got mad and threatened to break up with him unless B.A.Q. bought her two kitties. I'll leave the end to your imagination.

9. Can you remember your last daydream? What was it about?

J.C.Q. was playing happily with some kitties (seven of them in all) in a big lush colourful meadow. Mozart music was playing in the background. She was laughing and jumping and doing cartwheels.

10. If you were to thank someone today, who would you thank?

Levendis, T., and Hgh for getting two kitties so J.C.Q. can live vicariously through you.

Posted by Fishsticks on Saturday, October 15, 2005 at 14:52 | Permalink