J.C.Q.

Mensa. Harrumph. Answer the following question excerpted from their Workout:

23. Which of these is the odd one out?
Cat
Dog
Hamster
Rabbit
Elk

I answered Rabbit, because it clearly uses its front legs much less dependently than the others, thus giving it a unique locomotion. But no, Mensa docked me a mark because their dumb answer was "Elk. The only one that isn't a pet."

Well not only ain't this not a very good sentence strukture, but apparently they haven't talked to Uncle Bailey and his pet elk, namely Ellie. And apparently this is a *culturally-biased* test. If I lived in Nigeria how would I know that people kept aggressive "bunnies" as pets? Maybe someone should have specified DOMESTICATED RABBIT. Speaking of things starting with rab, what if the dog was rabid?

Would YOU keep a rabid dog as a pet? Even though it would be life threatening? Or would you let it spend its life shamefully drinking from your toilets? And what about a big jungle kitty?

I want a pet Elk. I would name it Elkie. I hope Brett reads this and buys me one. Sammy needs a playmate. Elkie could eat the seaweed that I refuse to clean up. It's not about me being lazy, but about Brett failing to find specific types of symbiotic relationship partners for our pets.

Posted by Fishsticks at 13:35 | Permalink | Comments

Now you too can figure out which Nigerian spammer you resemble.

Posted by Fishsticks at 09:37 | Permalink | Comments

T. and Levendis and Hgh and Mark and BAQ and me have a longstanding ritual of going to brunch at the Casino Regina Show Lounge at 10 a.m. on Sundays followed by hilariously starting to gamble before noon. We should probably call it Sinful Sundays, as not only are we gambling but also the food is so sinfully delicious. And they have a carved lard rooster that we chat with at the buffet line. You can't beat $2.66 for bacon, eggs, waffles, sausages, cheeses, salads, breads and other bakings, dessert bars, fresh fruit, and carved ham. But the buffet line is sometimes held up by one of a few older women who can't tell the difference between the strawberry sauce or ketchup. But I mean, really, who wouldn't want ketchup on their waffles and strawberries on their hashbrowns? They have a piano guy playing each week, but I think they should have karaoke. I think the lard rooster would like that.

Posted by Fishsticks at 08:31 | Permalink | Comments

T., Hgh, and Branflakes are getting pretty ticked off at me for not writing and LifeofTurner is probably ready to make JCQ DLQ. Due to my lack of presence, I will answer two e-mails this week for your viewing pleasure! Umm... wait... I'll make two posts today I mean.

I am getting really annoyed that no one can pronounce my name properly unless they know me well. I hate Jackie, but I was willing to go with it just so people would stop asking me to repeat myself and comment on how my name is so odd and ask it's origin and how I got it. But then I thought: why should I just go with Jackie? Why don't I go with something both hideous and extravagant?

So now, when people ask me: "What? Can you say your name again?" I will simply reply: "You can just call me Nelly." In my love-hate relationship with The Little House on the Prairie, this is the name of one of my favourite characters. However, that's not why I chose it; I'd just bought a plant for my dad by the name Nelly Moser. He is obsessed with this variety of Clematis Vine but it doesn't grow too well in Saskatchewan. So, anyway, try not to laugh if I introduce myself as Nelly Moser at our next party.

Posted by Fishsticks at 08:17 | Permalink | Comments