Fish and fish line
Today I figured out how to bind 81 sheets of three-hole punched paper together with fish line. It's actually a pretty sturdy document. We ran out of folders at work. But for some reason we have a huge roll if fish line. My colleagues were impressed. J.C.Q. 1, Boy Scouts 0.
Speaking of words that start with fish (I know, that was the worst segue ever), I have decided to start leaving voice-mails from B.A.Q.'s fish on his answering machine. Yesterday, during his shower, Perry the Paradise Fish left two messages. Oreo and Slurpee, who are both Panda Coreys, left one each. Perry can be a jerk sometimes and leaves messages with lots of swears. Oreo and Slurpee have very high-pitched voices and are good little fishies.
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:05 p.m. -- B.A.Q., this is Perry. Come and turn of our f*&*(&*^ light so I can get some sleep. And tell Oreo to turn down his damn music. Tell him to stay out of my territory of the tank. Or else I will have to imprison him in the nearest seashell for refusing to leave the Gaza Strip. -- BEEP
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:06 p.m. -- Daddy, were are you? This is Oreo. Perry is being mean to me and the other Panda Coreys. And he's re-enacting what he saw on the news today in an ass-backwards way, as if it were taking place in our own tank. I think he is a schizofishy. -- BEEP
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:07 p.m. -- B.A.Q., it's Perry again. Are you f*&$%#$ dumb? I need to get my rest. Why did you buy these stupid Panda Coreys for this tank anyway? As if the Minnows weren't bad enough. I demand my own tank. -- BEEP
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:08 p.m. -- [Sobbing] Daddy? This is Slurpee. Hurry! Perry is getting meaner and meaner and you're still in the shower! And he won't stop hogging the phone. Please let us go live with Sammy in the tank next door. Where are you?!?! -- BEEP
Of course, I did this while forgetting that Brett's friend is living with us. Thankfully B.A.Q. got to the messages first. By 10:05 B.A.Q. had posted The Riot Act on their tank and had gotten mad at Oreo for calling Perry a schizofish.
Speaking of words that start with fish (I know, that was the worst segue ever), I have decided to start leaving voice-mails from B.A.Q.'s fish on his answering machine. Yesterday, during his shower, Perry the Paradise Fish left two messages. Oreo and Slurpee, who are both Panda Coreys, left one each. Perry can be a jerk sometimes and leaves messages with lots of swears. Oreo and Slurpee have very high-pitched voices and are good little fishies.
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:05 p.m. -- B.A.Q., this is Perry. Come and turn of our f*&*(&*^ light so I can get some sleep. And tell Oreo to turn down his damn music. Tell him to stay out of my territory of the tank. Or else I will have to imprison him in the nearest seashell for refusing to leave the Gaza Strip. -- BEEP
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:06 p.m. -- Daddy, were are you? This is Oreo. Perry is being mean to me and the other Panda Coreys. And he's re-enacting what he saw on the news today in an ass-backwards way, as if it were taking place in our own tank. I think he is a schizofishy. -- BEEP
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:07 p.m. -- B.A.Q., it's Perry again. Are you f*&$%#$ dumb? I need to get my rest. Why did you buy these stupid Panda Coreys for this tank anyway? As if the Minnows weren't bad enough. I demand my own tank. -- BEEP
BEEP -- Tuesday at 10:08 p.m. -- [Sobbing] Daddy? This is Slurpee. Hurry! Perry is getting meaner and meaner and you're still in the shower! And he won't stop hogging the phone. Please let us go live with Sammy in the tank next door. Where are you?!?! -- BEEP
Of course, I did this while forgetting that Brett's friend is living with us. Thankfully B.A.Q. got to the messages first. By 10:05 B.A.Q. had posted The Riot Act on their tank and had gotten mad at Oreo for calling Perry a schizofish.
Oh my goodness, JCQ, you are hilarious. I think the sobbed message from Slurpee is my favourite. In other news, I never suspected BAQ of having fish with names like Oreo and Slurpee.
Posted by
Queen of West Procrastination |
11:41 AM
Hee hee, I named them for him. The other Panda Corey is called Cheddar Biscuit.
Posted by
Fishsticks |
12:39 PM
The only fish I named myself is the otto catfish which I call Otto Von Bismark. I am sure you agree that is more of a BAQ name.
Posted by
Anonymous |
3:07 PM
Otto Von Bismark sounds far more BAQ. I tend toward names from Victorian novels -- Dobbin (Vanity Fair) and Miss Mowcher (David Copperfield). But, I must say, that Cheddar Biscuit is fabulous.
Posted by
Queen of West Procrastination |
11:21 PM